A little broken

I think I am missing a chromosome.

Well I am missing a chromosome if there is a sports fan chromosome. I did not pay enough attention in Mr. Whalen's biology class back in the 10th grade I guess to remember. All I remember is him telling everyone that they needed to get organized. Anyhow, the point is I am an awkward sports fan so I must be missing that chromosome.

I went to a Boston Bruins hockey game on Thursday night with coworkers. It was a nice evening and I liked the game, but as I looked at all those screaming Bruins fans dressed in their black and yellow, I realized that has never and likely never be me. I am not referring to the black and yellow specifically or even hockey specifically but the team spirit thing. Now yes, I could wear team colors. That is not difficult. Yes, I could scream whenever everyone else does. But it does not come natural. What I realized is that I have never had and will likely never have intensity around a sporting event.

I have never watched a game, match or even a race and felt that extreme intensity. I never want to stand and scream. Hell...I barely feel the need to cheer. It is just not me. And it makes me feel a little broken. I do not have that type of passion when it comes to sports and I wish I did. I look around at those people and they really seem like they are having an amazing time. For me it never really ever gets much beyond an okay or possibly even good time. It is just not my thing.

I sit there instead thinking of how many hours of practice it must take to learn to skate backwards. I sit there wondering where did hockey start and wouldn't this game be funnier with novelty foam sticks. Or that both teams should have to wear identical matching uniforms to make it harder to know who is who to pass the puck. Or even instead of a penalty for high sticking, just take away their stick for two minutes. Or for the second period you can only skate backwards. Or blindfolds instead of penalties. I focus more on the crowd than the actual game.

I just wish I felt that emotion and intensity when it comes to sports - the agony when you lose, the exhilaration when you win, the desire to paint half my face or wear a novelty foam finger. I just do not have that in me. Maybe my parents dropped me as a child. I think we are supposed to blame our parents for this type of thing, right.

Oh well, I am who I am...but that does not mean I am not get a little jealous of those people when I go to sporting events. How can you not envy people so caught up in the moment they have to scream at the ref.